My Trial with my life (Part - 2)
My Trial with my
Life
The day came
for my first chemotherapy I was nervous but did not show it to anyone. It was
on Valentine’s Day when the world was celebrating day of love here I was in the
hospital ready for my first chemo session. Dr Shweta came in checked my vitals
and reassured me that I would be fine. I had seen patients undergo chemotherapy
but me being that patient was something I had never thought of myself. My
parents and my maasi as always were there with me present in the hospital. It
took me 5 long hours and tub full of injections and medicines, one anaesthetist
who stood along continuously monitoring my BP and pulse, Dr Shweta’s continuous
monitoring and Dr Talati who made sure to check on me every hour and my support
system holding on to my hand which made my chemo smooth as slicing a butter. Soon
the chemo ended but it was just the beginning of my long fight. The side
effects that I faced after those made me compel to rethink my decision of
fighting back making me so compelled and forced to leave my hope. Many times I
thought of quitting the fight as the pain was too much to bear I felt self-pity
and helpless in front of my pain. My whole body was feeling weak, those
uneasiness, sleeplessness, dizziness, numbness and bloating all over the body
and my lump was still bleeding. My papa would sit beside me for hours with me
and massage my legs and hands. It was a phase when I was again losing myself.
The next visit to doctor was in 7 days after chemo. Abhishek (my friend from
V.S) came to visit me, he suggested me to take TENS and stretching. Luckily
enough he had the machine with him so he treated me and gave me stretching too.
For the first time in 7 days I was feeling little better. In the evening I met
Dr Talati who explained that the pain would slowly subside in 7- 10 days. As
the days passed slowly I started getting better but the thing which I dreaded
started to happen I started losing my hair. I was feeling super low and for the
first time I was bursting on everyone who called me or tried to talk to me. They
kept mum and patiently listened to all the rubbish I would say. In no time, it
was time for my 2nd chemo session. This time my friends Karishma,
Mauli and Vishal had joined me for my chemo session trying to make it as a
friends outing rather than something serious. This time chemo felt like more of
a picnic than the nervousness which I felt in the first time. I was settling
down with the fact of undergoing chemotherapy and alongwith it the side effects
of chemotherapy too.
With the
passage of time here I am standing on the door step of my last chemo. Between
the first chemo to the last, my lump had dried up, all my hair went off and I
became bald making me proud to say it rather than that tinge that was there. I
realised who my real friends were who stood by me without any complaints. The
love and blessings which I got from all the members of the gym where I used to
work, there was not a single day when I did not receive a call from someone at
gym. In process I realised few people had become my family, Ragini aunty,
Sarita aunty, Falguni, Monalee, Harmeet. There was one more thing which was a constant
Vishal’s how are you message. Getting a call from Ankit everyday at 6 pm
without fail. Nijin patiently answering all my stupid queries, whenever I felt low
a phone call to Sparsh brought a smile on my lips. Video calls with Anoli and
Karishma made me feel they were not far from me. Rahul’s PDA msgs made me feel
super happy. My mumma, papa who bore all my mood swings, they were my punching
bags, I shouted at them, at times misbehaved but they always remained calm and
quiet. Probably they understood me more than me.
I am sitting
here in the hospital bed facing my last chemo session, I have realised after
all cancer was not that bad I did come till here fighting with my inner self
and that hope. It has made me a stronger person, one who is brave enough to
face any problems come what may. I will not bow down, I will fight and fight
till my last breath. Cancer also made me realise the importance of each and every
breath I take. The gift of life which god has given me and I need to value
it, the gift in the form of my parents
who have gone to each and every temple praying for me, my special friends who I
have been blessed to have in my life who
has stood by me without expecting anything in return from me. I am on a mission
of defeating cancer round 1 done. Round 2 come on let’s face it I am here
standing challenging you that you cannot change me, you can make me cry shout
and feel vulnerable but I won’t ever give you a right to rule me so come on I
am standing here to fight.
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